Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
