He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
