I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
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