Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
