Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
pop tarts are not kleenex
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
