She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
