Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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