I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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