I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Still dying that you shit outside
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
