fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
