You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
