I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize