i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
