I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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