"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
