Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize