i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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