Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
