So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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