we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
