I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
