I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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