He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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