I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
His nipple licking is glorious
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