Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
