mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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