Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize
