Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
