I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize