My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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