Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Randomize
