He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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