some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize