Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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