Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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