I wish you could order shots online.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
