wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
