After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
