If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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