Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
