I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I need a beard to bite.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
