HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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