I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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