Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
