Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
