This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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