Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
i think i just lost a toe
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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