I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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