good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize