I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Sorry about my life...
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Randomize
