why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
